Tuesday, March 15, 2011

CHANGE IS GOOD

It's been awhile since I posted something worth writing about on this blog.

You see, I have been taking some extraordinary changes in my life.  My sister in law's near death had an incredible resounding impact on me.  It was such a weird feeling that day I sat looking at her in the ICU.  I felt my body vibrate in away that said, you have to change Tracy.


And so I have...

I am now 17 pounds lighter, and 32 days into a sugar free, flour free, processed food free and dairy free kind of life.  I have to tell you that it's been no walk in the park.  In fact, it's been a complete crawl in the ditch. But for every crawl, you must eventually stand up, dust yourself off and take the baby steps that eventually lead you to regular steps, hoping that you will reach a jog and finally to a full out run.  And, I have my running shoes already laced up.  Because, I am leaving behind those things that bound me and dictated my life and I have taken control.  And what I see is my future.  And as corny as it sounds, it is bright and shiny there and I cannot wait to hit it in full stride.

Small changes make the sacrifice worthwhile, like the lessening of swelling and pain in my joints.  Not too mention the added bonus of compliments, like the other day, a lovely friend/colleague told me I looked good and then another friend told me that my face was glowing, neither of which even knew what I was up too.  Inside, I smiled that smile that said, this is only the beginning my friends.

I feel different.  And in someways, I actually feel beautiful.  Relaxed and peaceful. Kind of crazy huh.  It makes me cry a little thinking of it, and I am not sure why. Perhaps, I am starting to let go of that notion that I must deserve to be in this much pain.  It's alway been a belief I felt strongly about, kind of like my cross to bear in this lifetime.

But mostly, I am starting to feel more and more like Tracy.  I have to tell you, I have missed her.  I have looked for her for years. And finally, she is starting to emerge again.

I wonder why we fight against the tides of change.  I suppose it is the unknown, at least it is for me.  But if we did not give in to changes, we would spend our lives like caterpillars and miss that opportunity of developing into something more beautiful, more extraordinary.

Yes I know, I am tad mushy tonight, but it is all good because you know what?  It is true what they say:

Change is good.


Thank you to those who stuck around on my blog, having faith that I would come back, even when I didn't have faith in myself.  And thank you to those who recently signed up even when my blog said I was done, it made me wonder if I really was done afterall.

42 comments:

  1. Thank God you are back..
    Anyways happy to know some good changes have been happening inyour life and you are feeling beautiful and relaxed.. :-)

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  2. Sounds like you are on a wonderful journey of re-discovery at the moment. (See I can be mushy to)
    Glad to read you are doing so great!

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  3. Perhaps you should change your blog name, too. To AWESOME GIRL. I'm just sayin'.

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  4. Oh Tracy! That is so great! I'm so excited for you! And change IS good! Keep it up chica!

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  5. Writers don't stop, because they can't. Maybe a blog, where you just write...just a thought.

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  6. Isn't it amazing how changing what you put in your body can change the way you feel?
    Not just physically but mentally.
    I'm so glad you are feeling better in all ways!

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  7. Congrats! And I am so hearing you on the walk in the park vs. crawl in a ditch, great analogy.

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  8. Yay!! So glad to hear you're doing well. :)

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  9. you're gonna be all svelte and fabulous as you stroll about with your fancy handbags and designer jewelry.

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  10. It's good to have you back and I am very happy to hear that these changes have helped find Tracy again, and have lessened the pain.
    Change is good, indeed, sometimes it's just a matter of taking that leap of faith and letting go of fear, and then magical things start to happen.
    Have a wonderful day!

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  11. "and finally she is starting to emerge again" This line has me smiling. Sleeping beauty is waking

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  12. Nice to hear about your progress and to see you easing back into this.

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  13. It's really good to hear that you are feeling so much healthier and happier. Go girlie

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  14. Wow.. this is so good to hear:) You sound so happy..and peaceful..wonderful!

    I am so curious Tracy..as I read the list of what you are not eating..what is it that you can eat? It may help many..

    I sincerely hope your DSIL is well again one day ..

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  15. Change can be a great thing. It just takes getting out of our "comfort zone" to make it happen. I hope your SIL gets well and that she recovers quickly.

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  16. Yay! for you! The changes are what you needed, and even though the 'evil' side of your body cries out and complains, the good side is winning over. So glad to see you here and so happy for you!

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  17. Good for you! It must take a lot of self-discipline to make such drastic changes!

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  18. Welcome back. I am glad you found something that is making you feel better about yourself.

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  19. Amazing Tracy! I am so happy that you are feeling a bit better and that you have made some changes! You inspire me to get on the change band wagon with you! I have started walking for 30 minutes everyday....I feel so much better!
    Thanks for sharing...
    Hugs!
    Lesley

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  20. Change is wonderful. In change there is hope. I'm glad you've found some peace. Being happy with yourself is one of the best gives you can give you.

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  21. Congrats on the weight loss, that is just all kinds of awesome.

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  22. Thanks for all the kind words!

    @ Antares... thanks, I do have a separate blog for writing purposes for the articles I submit to a newspaper lifestyle column that I write monthly for.

    @ la table de nana, all veggies, fruit, protein and nuts and water. My lovely blogger friend Marcela, is supplying me with tons of receipes so it isn't so bland and boring.

    @ always playing with paper - you go Lesley... I am so proud of you! Cheers to you my friend!

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  23. Oh, AG, I thinkn we'll always be hear to listen whenever you come to talk. I'm glad things are going so well for you. Good on ya for having a desire to change and following that desire with action. Remember that you'll probably slip a little eventually, but it's like a muddy hill, three steps up and slide two steps down. You'll get to the top eventually.

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  24. Glad to hear you're back! Good luck with the change :-D

    I need to lose a few pounds, myself...

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  25. YAYAYAY!!!!! Sooooo glad to hear you're back and are feeling well!!!!! This post is beautiful and I'm sure your sister is proud of you!

    Best of luck!

    xoxo

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  26. nice post

    p.s if you want to stay on ma "daily visits" list, come to my place and leave a comment.

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  27. Oh tracey..I have done what you are doing in the past and it leads you to feeling GREAT.

    A few years back I went off wheat/gluten and within 3 days it felt literally like I had walked from a dark cave into a bright and hot sunny day.
    I did not know that i was feeling, that bad or that depressed.

    i need to do it again because after almost 2 years of being gluten free I fell hard off the wagon and have slowly being feeling like a fat depressed shmuck. I KNOW it has to do with diet.

    I just have to commit myself to it..but have been so depressed that it look like a bleak, hill to climb. I have made some changes, and am almost to the point where I feel like I could take the plunge and crawl through the ditch with you...

    way to go, starting is the hardest part.

    by the way which thrift store does your mom work at??? maybe it is in my neck of the woods!

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  28. OMG! Look at you! I have been SO far behind on my blog readings/commenting that I haven't even been on my dashboard lately to see who posted and who didn't! AND LOOK WHO DID!! Wow! I knew you'd come back. I just wanted to state that for the record.

    And wow! Good for you!! that's quite a big shift. No wonder you experienced a bit of a lull for awhile. WOW! I'm so impressed! YAY TRACY!! And happy to have you back!

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  29. Change is good indeed. So nice to have you back! And feeling better, too!!

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  30. Love it! You are absolutely right! Changes for the better are very good. I am learning the same things and trying my best to make the needed changes. Great job!!!!

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  31. I always love new beginnings :)
    even more than happy endings!!!

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  32. I'm so happy for you!! Getting back in touch with yourself and getting physically better and whatnot! YOu are such an inspiration! I love reading the things you have to say, because it is so relatable to me and to how I feel sometimes. Also, because you are embracing change so beautifully even though it can be hard. I'm so glad I "found" your blog!

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  33. Wow........ thank you so much for all the lovely comments... You guys are so wonderful! xxoo

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  34. Wow, Tracy, this is great news! I am so happy for you!
    I've been 'away' a lot, too, so I wasn't up on the latest with you...
    Wonderful!

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  35. Oh Tracy, this is such good news! I am glad you are feeling better, taking care of yourself, dusting yourself off, all with a sense of humour. It's eye opening when someone you love is near death's door. It makes a person ponder our own lives and often makes us want to become better people. You my darling, are no average girl!!!

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  36. Oh that is so sweet.... thank you Carole! xxoo

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  37. Way to go Tracy! I'm so happy you're back, healthier and better than ever. I can't wait to read more of the new sugarless, flourless, and weightless you. Isn't incredible how much better we feel when we eat healthier and eliminate all the crap? I agree, I think you should change the name of your blog too. How about It's not an Average life?
    xoxo

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