This Weeble has had quite a week and while I would love to bore you right into a snooze fest with all the gory details and specifics, I thought that perhaps point form would work best. And since I can't remember Monday, which is probably a good thing, the rest of the week was as follows:
- On Tuesday, I ordered chicken strips and salad with a side of curry sauce for my chicken. As I was walking back into my office parking lot, I dropped the curry sauce and it exploded like a bloody grenade! I had curry from the tips of my toes to the top of my head. I spent the next hour in my office kitchen exposing my lily white, chubby body donned in a black bra, turquoise and black polka dotted underwear and my goofy orthopaedic runners and sport socks whilst I scrubbed my clothes. Can you imagine if you walked in on something like that! Besides running out screaming for your life, I am betting you would be scratching at your eyes screaming “I’m blinded! I’m blinded!”
- Later on Tuesday, a client came in to talk to me, she kept avoiding eye contact with me and then finally she said “ummm Tracy and pointed to her nose”. Horrified, I pulled out my mirror and saw that I had a clump of curry hanging out of my nostril! Nothing like trying to explain to your client that it was not a booger in your nose! And yes, she did walk away from me very quickly like I had rabies! Ugh!
- Wednesday, I decided to go the safe route and buy some sushi for lunch. After I popped a piece into my mouth, I rubbed my eye forgetting that there was some wasabi on my fingertip! Yes I jumped out of my seat, said a crap load of unlady like profanities, followed by a crazy body dance and then my eye proceeded to water like a faucet, leaving me with mascara and eye make-up on one eye only!
- Wednesday night, I went for a waxing and moved my head at the wrong time and lost a small part of my eyebrow! Please grow back please grow back!
- Thursday, I was eating strawberries when I realized I had a seed stuck between my teeth. After an agonizing 20 minutes of not being able to get the little sucker out, I looked in my office drawer and found a thumb tack that I could use as a dental pick and accidentally stabbed my lower lip! There is a plus side to this one though. My lip swelled right up for 10 hours and I looked like I had a sexy pout going on! I might have to accidentally stab my lip again for future sexy lip looks!
- And I won’t elaborate on Friday, as it’s not quite over and let’s face it, I am afraid too!
One thing is for sure, this Weeble may wobble, but she isn’t going to let anything make her fall down (because apparently I can do that ALL by myself)!
Have a fantabulous, safe, non exploding weekend!
Cheers to all of you!