Saturday, January 29, 2011

TO THONG OR NOT TO THONG.... that is the question my friends

This has been a question that has floated thru this addled brain of mine for years. Last night the controversy was stirred up again when I was sitting with one of my younger family members and we got to talking about them.

Oh sure, I have had my share of thongs, but I have to be honest, I have found I partially preferred thongs when they were actually a shoe you stuck on your foot as oppose to a piece of dental floss stuck between your butt. Beautiful, enticing and lacey, they always seem to call to me when I am in a lingerie aisle, those along with incredibly pretty bras have always caught my breath. And sadly, I have a whole drawer full of lace which if I calculated the cost altogether, I would venture to say that I could buy a small remote island and retire!

Anywhooo, it came to my attention last night that I may have reached the age and body where a thong should be hung up and retired. Not that it probably every looked cute on me any time in my life, but I am pretty sure that when I wear one now, I look like I am sporting a European Flag between two very large hamburger buns! Ah yes, thongs are for those perky, youthful derrieres, you know the ones I am talking about, still smooth and unblemished from years of sitting on them, from years of exercise neglect or years of exposure to sun. No matter how womanly you feel, there comes a time in every girl's life to reassess the thong and it just might be the right time to hang up that thong especially when your patooty starts to take on the distinct look of a large brick of swiss cheese.

So it is "without" great remorse that I hand over the thong torch to the next generation. I am done with the friction between my poor butt cheeks. They have done their service and now deserve comfortable cotton briefs. Besides, its not whether you wear something lacey or something cotton, just as long as you know how to rock the panties... And this chickalet can rock anything, even granny panties!

Until next time
Smooches

43 comments:

  1. Good for you. You've inspired me, I think I'll also hand my thongs down to the next generation.

    Hopefully they are wearing gloves.

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  2. I think you may just want to do us all a service and put yours right into the garbage Kev! lol

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  3. I was personally was never into wearing the rectal floss. And who says little comfy cotton briefs aren't sexy? ;p

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  4. Yes - down here in the land of the sunshine Thongs are for wearing on your feet.
    Unless you are a skinny little thing in wich case you are very welcome to wear a piece of rectal floss (love that description). Not my idea of fun these days - might go into long skirts again and do without the undies altogether lol
    Cathy

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  5. i put in several years in the floss & i worked it, but then came the baby & away went the thongs. you could always just go commando.

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  6. I don't do any kind of thong. I gave up that footwear decades again. Gave up the thong undies about 5 or so years back.
    I don't even want to think about what I would look like wearing them now.

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  7. As a dancer, they are helpful in the sense that you can wear underwear and not have them peek from the bottom of your costume/leo... but that's about it. I wouldn't/shouldn't rock them as everyday attire. Ugh.

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  8. I went through my thong phase pretty early in life and can honestly say the only time I wear them now is right before nookie because I know they are coming right off. (Was that too much info? Sorry!)I am in my giant granny panty phase now...you know the ones that hold your tummy in and lift your butt at the same time. I just can't seem to find a happy medium that doesn't make me look "bumpy".

    Great post topic by the way!

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  9. Well said and done!
    I never wore thongs. I have always found them VERY uncomfortable. I prefer briefs.
    Have a nice Sunday!

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  10. Thong the thong thong thong! That was an enjoyable song, not so much the lyrics, but it had a catchy tune.

    Regardless of age, I think thongs should probably be retired all together and all around.

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  11. Thongs are harmful in all ways and necessitate extra waxing. Besides, they just get lost in my bum now and it takes me ages to heave them out at the end of the day. I only ever wore them in my youth to avoid the VPL, and now the only tight thing getting on my rear end is a monstrous pair of sucky-in granny knickers that must be worn under my Desigual dress. Now there's another kind of underwear I'd like to have a brawl with...

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  12. thongs on my feet and comfy undies on my bum. Only way to be. Couldnt care less about VPL most days.
    I think a sadistic male designed the whole gstring underwear.

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  13. I never got the whole "thong" thing. I'm sorry but if I wanted undies up my ass then I'll pull em up there! I don't see the need to buy underwear especially designed for this. :)

    Once: A guy I was dating (bonking) told me he liked to wear thongs. WHOA! To much info!!

    ReplyDelete
  14. Thongs for me were hung up after I had my little sweet pea. I had enough going on without having the added irritation of yanking that thing out from "the hamburger buns".

    CBG
    canadianbloggergirl.blogspot.com

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  15. they are they most uncomfortable invention ever! I'd rather go without and I have been known to be a true scotswoman lol!

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  16. oh my, I am lol after reading your post and the comments! My hamburger buns are of the king-sized type, so granny panties for me. I just never did lose the urge to keep plucking that string out of my crack...and how awesome is that to see in public?

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  17. Loved this post! Unfortunately (or fortunately, depending on how you look at it--pun intended) the thong came into fashion long after I acquired swiss cheese hamburger buns, so I never had the pleasure (?) of dental floss chafing!

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  18. So I guess I can keep the pair from the underwear drawer I filched at the party?

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  19. I have a terrible lingerie addiction, and I too could likely buy a small country with the monetary equivalent of what I've spend on it all. I even did an entry about my addiction because it's so ridiculous...>.>;

    Thongs can be comfy if you get the ones that are just a band for um, between the cheeks part? I will admit that I don't have many though since I only wear them when wearing a silky skirt and don't want a line (rarely happens) or if I'm dressing for someone (never happens since I'm single and not dating =P).

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  20. I've never been a thong person. I just can't get into the groove wearing them. Actually, that's my problem, the thongs get into the groove, but I don't. - G

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  21. Im not really a thong person. I find it to be uncomfortable. I'd say your too old when your a teacher and wearing a pink thong with white pants. (I had a teacher that did that. I was in 6th grade. It was gross)

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  22. You could always go commando. Same effect as a thong without the friction.

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  23. Have to say, I couldn't get by properly without my thongs. Especially at the gym. I've tried wearing regular panties to the gym and they just bunch up and end up as a bigger wad trying to stuff itself into my butt. No thanks! When I'm home lounging though, boy cut shorts all the way.

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  24. Thongs were never for me. Never cared for the walking-around-with-a-permanent-wedgie-feel.

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  25. Here in the UK, Marks and Spencers have the reputation of being a 'mum's store'. But when they introduced briefs that did't show a VPL I was hooked. Forget 'Fanny Floss' go for comfort, Bridget Jones eat your heart out!!! xxx

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  26. Well, how the heck did thongs get so darn popular when it appears everyone hates them?! I am amongst those whom have never worn them and never will, much to Bud's dismay. If I got back down to my high school weight, then I might reconsider for the "fun times". Other than that, no way in hell!

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  27. Likewise, I shall now forgo the banana hammock whilst at the beach.
    Think of the children!

    ReplyDelete
  28. i am proud to say i've never worn thongs and hopefully never will! even at an early age i had a huge derreire(actually all of me was/is huge) so i couldn't even if i wanted to! But lovely post, i couldn't help from really LOLing

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  29. please do think of the children Al!!! Good lord! lol

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  30. Funny post and comments. Never did the thong thing, never will. Why not just go naked? As OT says, it's the same effect. (Not that I would. I'll leave thongs and nudity to the younger, skinnier b- er, ladies.)
    xoRobyn

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  31. I tried wearing thongs but hated that wedgie feeling as well. Bleh!

    ReplyDelete
  32. It's not the shape of the derriere so much as what goes on in between the but cheeks no matter what age you are! Never could abide the things, and when they first came out, I was convinced they'd never become popular. They did. I'm still trying to work out why!

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  33. ummm... I'm not ready to give up my thongs! They are too damn comfortable!
    I like them and you can't make me get rid of them, so there. :-P

    ReplyDelete
  34. Whats worse than a thong? Those "cheeky" panties! Because not only do you have one thin strand of fabric between your cheeks, the entire pair of panties tries to creep up there!

    http://lesliejmoon.blogspot.com/
    http://cubicle-confessional.blogspot.com/

    ReplyDelete
  35. After baby #2 came along, the thongs were officially retired in my house. (At least until the day my daughter wants to start buying them. God help me when that happens!) My husband doesn't even care what my underware look like; he prefers them on the floor! lol *blushing*

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  36. Thongs are an interesting phenomenon. They're pretty, enticing, disappear under clothing, and are also surprisingly comfortable. Still, I prefer bikini panties or boy shorts (the sexy-cute Juicy Couture kind). Honestly, at this point, I just want to be 100% comfortable and a thong doesn't cut it.

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  37. I have a handful of pretty thongs that I wish I would wear, but I always end up going for my comfy cute bikinis instead. I think thongs look pretty by themselves, but on someone I think they look a little funky.
    -Lindsay
    http://noomoreblogs.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  38. Never have and never will wear thongs. The literally ONE that I own, made me feel so uncomfortable the whole day I knew they just weren't for me. Now flip flops are another story. My Flops are the love of my life.

    ReplyDelete
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