A childhood friend of mine, Sina, shared an old wives tale from her Grandmother's Norwegian background the other day on facebook. Basically, she said that if you wanted a repeat of the year you just had, you should keep up your Christmas Tree until January 1 so that you bring your past year into your new year. If you want to leave your year behind, make sure that you take down that tree before January 1. So me in all my head and chest cold glory, worked feverishly to get that bloody tree and all the decorations down before midnight last night! No way Jose was I going to experience a repeat performance of 2010. This girl was done with that year! Out with the old and in with the new is what the doctor ordered.
Unfortunately, with all my running around like a maniac on chocolate covered coffee beans, I strained my already flam-filled chest to the brim.
Hacking and whacking up fur balls and wheezing and sneezing this morning, I broke down into an obnoxious coughing fit that saw me seeing stars!
And just as I was making my way over to the bathroom the unthinkable happened. I started to sputter and splatter and coughed so hard that perhaps just slightly my bodily functions did not hold so well. Okay, damn it! I peed my pants! YUP, I PEED MY FREAKING PANTS!
In a desperate attempt to save face and make sure that nothing more came out, I squeezed my pudgy knees together and knobby kneed my way over to the bathroom with one hand covering my mouth and one hand covering my whooo haaaa! There was no saving face as I could hear my better half break out in raucous laughter!
I suppose that it just wouldn't be me if I didn't enter into a New Year with a big bang! But I have to admit, if this is what the beginning of 2011 is going to bring, all I can say is wake me up when 2012 hits.
Oh and by the way, could you please pass me a box of Depends?
Until Next Time.